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Free Fall?

18 Nov

Okay, God.  Where do we go from here?

 

I’ve no clue where on earth I’m going to be a month from now, or a year, or a decade.  Do you know that feeling?  It’s not an easy feeling to deal with.

I used to have my whole life planned out, even down to the names of my children.  (In that freaky, meticulous way young teenage girls plan their lives.) I knew where I wanted to live, what career I wanted to take.  But now things are different–I’m learning how to be utterly clueless.

I’ve got less than 2 years until I graduate high school, and I don’t even have the faintest, foggiest idea of where I want to take my life after that!  I don’t know where I’ll live (heck, I might go live in a whole different country!) I don’t know what I want to do (nurse, maybe?  veterinarian?  I’ve no clue whatsoever!)

So I don’t know very much as far as life is concerned, but I’m okay with that.  I can let go of the ropes and free fall, knowing that God will catch me before I hit the ground and go SPLAT!

It’s a hard lesson to learn.  And it’s a hard thing to do, to just sit back in complete faith, trusting that God will get me where I need to be.  I struggle with it every single day.  It’s on my mind all the time.  And sometimes, I just want to say “Forget this, I’m gonna do this MY way!”  When that thought enters my mind, it makes it really hard to trust God.  Really hard.  But Lord, you’ve got my back, and don’t ever let me forget it!

I haven’t the faintest idea where my life will take me, but all I can say is that I’m excited.  I don’t know what I’m excited for, specifically, but I’m excited!! When I think of all the wonderful possibilities that are opening up right in front of my face, I thank God, because not many 14-year-olds have the opportunities that I have.  And whatever happens, it’s gonna be great.

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1 Comment

Posted by on November 18, 2009 in Ramblings About Nothing

 

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One response to “Free Fall?

  1. Chappie

    November 23, 2009 at 22:50

    Dear Shannon’s Blog;

    I totally know what you mean. I feel clueless ALL the time lately, and not only about the future, but also concerning relationships, christianity, and life. Its so hard to deal with. You can wind up feeling helpless and weak. Its like God is teaching me to trust him and free fall, and all I can do is grab each branch or rock that juts out from the cliff face I fall next to. Each time I reach for somthing I may stop for a second, but there is no permenence in that, just an interuption in my descent. I am at the point now where I realize that from the moment I accepted Christ into my heart I was intended to trust Him and have Him guide me in every area of life. Scary. At least at first. Once I broke past the fear of trusting,(which for me is actually an on going process) I slowly realized the incredible peace that is found in the fact that the God of the universe is in complete control of my life. I needn’t worry, because if He is in control, good will result. This peace will then grow into the excitement that you are experiencing, and I can’t wait.

    Shannon, I want you to know that I really admire you and am sycked about the incredible plans He has for you. Keep writing.

    Chappie

     

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